Communication Breakdown

Today I experienced a genuine communication breakdown using that Common Language.  There I stood filling my bags at the mega TESCO. I was tired and thirsty and sticky and hot. The woman at the till clearly wanted to get me through because she was taking a break (I closed her gate at her request).  I have a system for off-loading my trolley and then filling my bags and returning the bags to the trolley for transport to the car. It is orderly, practical, and proven.  It works.  But , B…. (my favorite expletive here) h..l, do NOT rush me and do not interfere!

She did!  She actually started picking up beverage bottles  while grabbing the handle of a bottle bag (which I use for my flower bouquets) intending to shove them in.  I have a specially designed bottle bag incorporating a small IKEA blue bag with a cardboard bottle holder inside it.  The bag does not break and the cardboard keeps the bottles from knocking about. It folds to store inside my other bags when not in use. Perfect!

So, not at all annoyed, I politely stopped her interference by saying, “I have a system.”  and calmly requested she scan and pass the chips to top off the bag I was filling.  Nothing! I asked for the chips again. Finally, I pointed to the bag beside her hand and requested it again.  She looked and then with an expression I can only infer meant “what an imbecile” replied with, “Oh  the crisps. You mean the CRISPS.”

chips Big BlOOdy Sighhhh!  Yes, those thinly sliced potatoes fried to fragile crispness and lightly salted were indeed what I was requesting.

6 thoughts on “Communication Breakdown

  1. While in USA during the 1980s I used the right words, sidewalk, band-aid, etc but because I spoke with an English accent I was allegedly unintelligible.

  2. I’m so used to translating things (in my blog, and blogs I had before this one) from Britspeak to US English that this wouldn’t have fazed me, but maybe she wasn’t used to Americans?

    1. Well, except for habitually using the term “dollars” while thinking “pounds” I seldom fail to use the appropriate Britspeak word. I have a group that I socialise with that just tell me to use American words…but with everyone else I tend to use British words and mostly British pronounciation because sometimes they do not get the different vowel sounds. This time I lapsed. They also flutter their eylids when my bankcard requires signing.

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